We see images of Santa, angels, bells, stars, trees, and lights all around us starting after Halloween. It’s easy to get caught up in the commercial side of the holidays. We think we need all of the latest gadgets, decorations, and expensive gifts. But the holidays are really about sharing love and spending treasured time with family. So, whatever holiday you celebrate, you make your own traditions.

When I was a girl, my parents celebrated Christmas with a service in a small, poor, local church. Our family sang carols, we girls played our violins, Mother read scripture, and Daddy gave a short message. After the service, we shared oranges and apples with the families and they shared a piñata with us. It became a family tradition of giving that I wanted to continue with my own children.

One year, as a single parent family with two little girls, we had no money to buy a tree. To my astonishment, some kind person left a tree on our front porch. Without money to buy decorations, we made paper cut-outs, and put them and favourite toys on the tree, tying them with hair ribbons. We thought it was beautiful. We were together, and we hugged each other -that was all that mattered.

We created traditions back then that are still honoured now that we are all older. We made cookie houses – like gingerbread houses – to give to family friends. We made meaningful presents for each other: an apron, card, or photo. As they got older, the girls made little coupon books, saying things like: “I will wash the dishes for one week without being asked.” We decorated the tree, hung stockings, and made music together. One year, we sang carols at a local hospital on Christmas Day, and patients rolled up in wheelchairs with tears streaming down their cheeks saying, “You didn’t forget us.”

We often didn’t have much money, but when I look back on it now I think that was a good thing. We were together, sharing what we had. That didn’t cost much. It was the thought, the love, and the giving that was most important, along with just being together.

Now the girls have their own families. We still get together and hang the stockings on Christmas Eve, and take turns filling them. Every year on Christmas morning we make a special breakfast, and each of us has a special part to play. We tie ribbons around the dogs’ necks and take them for a special walk. We work together to plan and cook a special dinner for all of us. These things are not about what gifts we get, but about being together. We discovered we are all “Santa,” and we all pitch in to make the day extra special.

These are our family traditions. It is these traditions that help us celebrate being together. Whether we have money to buy things or not, it’s the sharing of love that makes the holiday season so special.

Joanne McNeal is a McCauley grandmother, who is still a teacher, musician, artist, and writer.