Our idea of fun does change as we age. Cyndi Lauper used to sing, “Girls just wanna have fun” in the 80s, but that may not be true anymore. I think we live in an overindulgent time and society right now. I have enjoyed all the fun I’ve had, but now I find I am losing interest in fun (as a form of distraction) and get more satisfaction from work.

The kids are approaching the age that they want more independence. I do get concerned about the amount of time they spend just distracting themselves, especially with video games, but they do help out somewhat with their few chores, and give a very good effort with their studies. I often have to remind myself that they have a completely different perspective at their age when it comes to fun. And that’s okay. But it sure seems like things have skewed a lot more toward self-distraction rather than enjoying being productive in this day and age.

I’m hopeful that they will find the satisfaction of hard work someday soon. The kids are blessed with many strong well-educated women in their lives who have taught them that anything is possible. The teenage years can be challenging at times. Trying to strike the right balance between “freedom to choose your own destiny,” and a parent’s desire to protect kids from things they don’t know about, is tricky at best. Just this week I told my son, “You’re free”, and he responded, “It sure doesn’t feel like it.” And I said, ”It never really does.”

I guess my point is that I’ve just come to accept that regardless of how much freedom you grant your kids, they will always find something to criticize. I think that is a perfectly normal part of growing up. Even when I say or do nothing, I get accused of “guilt-tripping.” It’s funny.

Despite the challenges, I’m glad we have kept the communication lines open. I always tell the children, “I do not possess the truth, I only have my perspective.” They don’t even accept that! They usually respond, “Oh no, you’re definitely a Truth Possessor.” You can’t win. My favourite times are when we chat like good friends would. My least favourite times are when they get a little too cocky and start disrespecting their elders. Yes, you really can’t win. But it’s pretty fun raising kids and watching them go through the various phases of life.

D. S. Carlson lives in Edmonton and has family in McCauley.